I Am 11

I am eleven years old. It’s a Saturday night and me and my sister are at our dad’s. To be more accurate I’m under the window of the bedroom we share, reading a comic while my sister is on the other side of the bedroom door trying to get in. Doing his best to prevent... Continue Reading →

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The Smack

He’s late, but then he always is. It probably doesn’t help that I’m always early, but there you go. It’s hot. One of those days where it feels like the pavement’s going to catch fire. I could really go a pint and I’m half tempted to just go ahead and order. It feels wrong sitting... Continue Reading →

I Am 26

I am 26 years old. I moved to Sweden a little over a year ago and have just completed my Swedish language course. According to my school I can now speak Swedish to a reasonable level. They’re wrong though, I can’t. Unless I’m drunk, I find Swedish quite intimidating. I do my best, but my... Continue Reading →

I Am 5

I am five years old. Our family day out at the seaside has ended badly. In seething silence my parents march me up the concrete ramps that cross the train tracks at Chalkwell train station. They're annoyed, very annoyed. It's all my fault as they make abundantly clear whenever there is no one else around.... Continue Reading →

I.D. & Me

I guess it all started when I bought the world’s worst iPhone. Well maybe not the worst, although it’d have a strong claim to the title if it wished. What I didn’t realise at the time was just how little memory it had. Phone memory not being something I’d really considered before. I use my... Continue Reading →

Pernilla & Me

I can’t remember whose bright idea it was to get married in Scotland. Let alone where the plan for getting hitched on a little Scottish island came from. It could have been mine, then again it could have just’ve easily been Pernilla’s (my then bride to be). It was definitely one of us, unless of... Continue Reading →

Bowie & Me 3

Ashes to Ashes was the first time I recall connecting Bowie with anything. I was seven years old when it arrived and already knew and liked Space Oddity despite having no idea who actually sang it. Back then I never took much notice of who was behind the songs that escaped from the little radio... Continue Reading →

I Am 9

I am nine years old and going to school in Laindon, despite the fact that I live in Pitsea. The big day has arrived. I can't remember exactly which one of them it was, it might have been Princess Margaret or possibly Anne, I'm fairly sure it wasn't The Queen. To be honest though it's... Continue Reading →

Bowie & Me 2

There were no virgins at my senior school. Everyone had 'done it' with various girls too many times to count. "You a virgin?" was the question everyone dreaded back then, and woe betide you if you didn't have a decent answer. My story was that I'd had it away with a girl I met in... Continue Reading →

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